My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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