so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
This couple is walking their pig around campus
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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