Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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