3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
