I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
