so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
