dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
