he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
