We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
