Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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