So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Those nachos came to me in a dream
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
