I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
