the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
