Small penises have feelings too.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
