you guys were way drunker than both of me
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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