Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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