things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
