i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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