this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
