She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
