i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
