This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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