dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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