I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
handjob tips. give me some.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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