Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
