I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
