Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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