I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
