tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
