Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
