hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
