it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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