I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm sobbing to NWA
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