so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
