I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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