OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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