This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
