You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
