i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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