Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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