everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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