Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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