normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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