People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Randomize
