We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
