Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just cut my nipple shaving
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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