the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
They took my balls.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
