I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
