Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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