"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
